I have been thinking about this...Several things come to mind. I believe that lots of men feel unappreciated and put down these days, almost like second class citizens, because the media has made it so we should "feel good" about putting them there. And sometimes we are just kidding and talking with our girlfriends and don't realize what comes out of our mouths....but we should be careful how we talk about our husbands, as they should be cautious how they speak about us in public. Women have come to tell jokes about their husbands in the bedroom or their work ethic, like some men used to joke about their wives cooking, ala Ray Ramano, in Everybody Loves Raymond! Long ago, I was at a church service, and during the social hour, I overheard some women, literally in a joking manner, or trying to be , speaking of how they were glad to have separate vacations from their husbands. "Just wait til YOU'VE been married as long as we have", they said....... I have heard women say "their husbands don't amount to much unless they bring home that paycheck! I heard one man say that his exwife, used to make him quit his job and get another that would bring home more money, as the one he had was'nt good enough anymore. I even had someone I heard saying that her husband said they could'nt do this or have that, she didn't say this, but because she "wore the pants" and had "the money" she could do as she pleased, and HE would just have to deal!!! What is it with these people!!!!?????? Ironically, look around, its written all over the faces of our men!.....They are beaten down, taken advantage of, and basically all they are good for is their "baby making" and their earning potential....Let me tell you, I have been married before, and pretty much most men can do both of those...Its a special man and BLESSED man, that has a woman that is glad to be his helpmeet, wife, and mother to his children, or at least caretaker of their home/ pets...whether it be a high fashioned home , a ranch in the country or a little cabin in the forest. We can show our husbands respect by a few things...
As Godly women, we should try to think about our husbands as we want them to think of us.. We are not just "meat", "just sexy" or just "the cook "or the "baby maker" we are intelligent, soft, kind, can be tough, and work outside the home too, and yet we are gentle, educated, fun women and some of those other things too....
1. Since he brings home the most of the money and works very hard for it, I try to spend it carefully. I also bring home some money, but I still put that in the house acct, and WE use it together. We don't have the "I bring and you bring", its "we bring" ~
2. When I go shopping for groceries or clothes, I don't grab just cuz I want it. I look at it, ask myself do we need it? Do I really want it? and if its a want over necessity I would never put our money in jeopardy to have it, usually I go home and try to make it out of something I already have and comes our better in the long run, as I get what I want without the extra money being spent! At the grocery store, especially with food prices going thru the roof! I try to find the best for the least that I can. If it doesn't matter , I will buy the cheapest. We live in a small town, and the store only takes magazine and newspaper coupons, not the ones printed off the computer...so that makes it extra hard. I know people must think, "gosh she is staring at the broccoli for a long time", but you know, I try to respect my husband and God by spending his money(which actually God provided the job, in which to make the money, so realistically it is God's money first!)
3. I try to wear things that will not make my husband embarrased when we are out. I know alot of women think they are trying to be sexy and they think that if they look that way that other men will think more of their guy, like "wow, that guy has all the luck". NO, that isn't what they think, men are all made the one way when it comes to "that" subject, and he is thinking, "wonder what she is like"....think about that for a moment. I dated a guy for awhile, that wanted me to dress a certain way when we went out, to attract that kind of attention, he thought it made him look good.(like eye candy) No, after I thought about it for awhile, it made me look "cheap", no matter why I did it..cheap is cheap whether you are married to the guy or not... Do you think your husband would like it if a man asked him that? I don't think so! So if you don't dress that way, guys won't think that way... I know you are thinking they should keep their minds out of the gutter. I even heard a pastor say once that as a youth pastor, "its hard to look at their hearts, when they are showing their parts". ALL MEN HAVE THIS ISSUE, and if we are careful not to make their husbands look at us, I'm sure their wives and girlfriends would appreciate it too. I am not saying we should dress like a sack of potatoes, or look unkempt and frumpy! Im just saying that we should be God honoring when we are out; and honoring to our spouse, whether he is present or not. I can tell you that men think this way, because I have been dressed to the nines and hit upon, and I've been barely outta bed, at the market, in jeans and tee shirt, no make up,(I know shameful, huh?) and been hit upon! They don't care, and the more you show, the more they want to know..you know???? So dress modestly, and carefully. Look in the mirror before you leave the house. ...leaning over, and bending over. I have a little checklist I use, you can make up one of your own. We need to be responsible to our husbands, and God. I am reading a book called "Sexy Girls"" How hot is too hot" ~ By Hayley DiMarco, she is a Christian author.... at one part in the book she said "what if there is a guy that is dressed like a cop, all the hat, uniform and gun, walking down the street and you run up to him, asking him for help...And he says " I can't help you lady, Im not a real cop, I'm just dressed this way." THINK ABOUT IT If we dress a certain way, then men might think we are trying to get attention for something that we don't want attention for. I'm not saying that women that dress a little too much showing deserve "rape" or bad treatment or wolf whistles....But, it is up to us to check ourselves out before we leave the house, it shows self respect for ourselves, and for our husbands. Ihave found since I have been dressing more modestly, I get so much more respect from men, women, even the younger crowd..Also we want to show our daughters proper respect, and our young sons, respect for the opposite sex.
4. I try to make sure I look good for him when he is home. Now, again, my hubby comes home at 4 in the morning, so sometimes, I am dressed from the day, or sometimes, I have showered and clean jammies on, if I have had a hard day, ready for bed, but still pretty enough for him. And being blessed that I can keep his schedule with him, we have tea and a snack watch DVR programs that he missed earlier and wind down and go to bed about 6 am, and then get up around 12-2 pm and do it all over again...But fortunately that is our life, we are in the season of no young children to take to school or practices, but not everyone has that leisure...I try to at least have clean clothes or cute nightie/jammies on, at all times, brush your hair for him, it doesn't have to be curled or coiffed, just clean and brushed. Teeth brushed, and mouth smelling nice for that "I'm glad you are home, kiss", and maybe have his meal ready or his jammies fresh out of the dryer for warmth, or whatever, you get the idea... sometimes, I have the tea water on when he walks in the door or I have had my hubbys slippers right by the door, so he can step out of work shoes, and step into his comfy slippers and relax..
last but not least of all....
5. Pray for him. Pray that he is safe, on his way to work, at work, at lunch, play, weekend off, coming home from work etc..My hubbys work is only 5 min away, but they say that most accidents occur within 5 miles of home....and we have a lot of deer, bear and elk out roaming the roads at 4 am!. Your husband needs your prayers, and you will feel so much more love and respect for him, as you pray for him. It really is amazing, try it, you will see what I mean. It does'nt have to be long or religious either, just a "thank you Lord for my hubby and keep him safe."
I hope this made sense, I was kinda frustrated with some of the things I have heard out of women's mouths about their guys, lately and felt compelled to write about it. If you just love your man to pieces and try to do all you can and support him with your shopping, cooking, baking, praying and just being a wonderful wife to them, that makes all the difference in how they will treat you as their partner and lover for life.
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